I Just Want to Be "Normal"

7:08 PM chronicmigraineellie 0 Comments

Living with a chronic illness can often make you feel like you are the farthest thing from normal. From canceling plans to staying home from school, the chronic unpredictability takes a toll on our mental states. While I've been a victim of this mindset, I've also realized that the definition "normal" is independent to every person.
While I wasn't a person in high school who was going out every weekend and hanging out with friends all the time, my "normal" was learning how to live with my migraines and still enjoy my life. Now, in college, it's trying to manage all of my activities while also managing my migraines. For other people, their "normal" might be completely different than mine, and that's completely okay.
It's important to realize that even if you don't fit the mold for a cookie-cutter student/employee/person, that's good. You have something that makes you an individual, even though it can sometimes hinder your general quality of life. For me, my silver lining of my chronic migraines is that I've become an extremely strong person who can deal with a lot of problems thrown my way. I've also learned how to advocate for myself, deal with people who don't understand my illness, and recognize when I need to ask for help. For me, that has made me a better, stronger and more mature person.
Now, it's taken me almost 2 1/2 years to come to this mindset, it doesn't come just overnight. I've spent many nights crying because I felt like I wasn't normal and I wasn't following the "track" of my fellow students. This just lead me to realize that while no one says it out loud, everyone is on a different track. Everyone, whether they have illnesses or not, struggles and needs help. If you look at it this way, everyone is normal, because there really is no definition of "normal." My normal is waking up, taking 4 pills in the morning, doing what I need to do, taking 2 more pills at 7:30, doing whatever else I need or want to do, getting ready for bed and taking an oral solution of another medication. It sounds intense, but this is what helps me to function. There is a set routine of what I do and what I take, even if my day deviates into becoming a "migraine day."
The word "normal" is independent, it takes on a different meaning for each and every person. In a society where trying to conform is applauded, it sometimes makes it hard to realize that no matter what you are going through, you are "normal." There are other people going through what you are going through, and you should never feel ashamed to take a personal day or to make excuses for your illness.
Become confident in your "normal," in your own routines. Become comfortable in what you need to do to make yourself healthy and happy. It's a hard journey, one that even I'm still struggling with. However, by struggling and accepting this, dealing with your illness will hopefully become easier because you won't feel like an outcast in society.
Enjoy your week, and comment below what you think your normal is whether you have an illness or not!
Have a lovely, migraine-free week.
xoxo- Ellie

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